Scary Mommy = Scared Mommy

My post, Weaning Woes, is going to be published on Scarymommy.com! So cool!

While I’m honored that such a popular website chose me, and my words, I’m also so terrified I feel sick (no wait that’s the pregnancy nausea I still have at 17-weeks). Seriously, though, I’m one scared mommy.

Before I get into why I’m afraid (and it’s not of success! Bring. It. On.), here’s how all of this happened.

I emailed Scarymommy.com a few of my pieces from months ago, the one about D falling off the bed, the one where I talk about feeling like a mommy zombie, and the one about basically being turned away from a steakhouse because I brought a baby. A few minutes later I received an auto reply that read something like this: “If we like you, we’ll contact you in the next 7-days. If you don’t hear from us, we don’t like you. We get too many submissions to reply to everyone. Sorry.”

The next day, I heard from their content manager, who said something like this: “Great posts! But they’re too long and not general enough. Shorter, more broad pieces do better on our site. Feel free to submit additional work.”

I was annoyed because rejection sucks, but she was right. Those posts are SUPER long, and speckled throughout I had my daughter’s name among other details that are too specific.

So, I forgot about it. Until I was inspired to write about my weaning experience with D. In doing so, I decided to write in a more general way since my goal is to write for a larger audience eventually anyway. And then I submitted and she loved it!  She actually said that too!

Now here we are. Weaning Woes will be published on Scarymommy.com on October 20!

I’m excited, of course, but I’m also scared. I’m scared because rather than getting paid, because the post was published here first, I’ll get a link back to this site. This means that thousands of people could potentially read all my other blogs. The ones about infertility. Miscarriage. My brother’s mental illness. The ones about being a child abuse survivor. This means that when I share the Scary Mommy link on Facebook, those curious enough will come here. A few of my close friends follow this blog, but most do not. A few of my friends also know about all of my “issues,” but most do not. See, scary. I’m proud of how far I’ve come, but I still have so far to go, you know?

I’m tempted to make it difficult to find my most sensitive posts, but I feel like that’s a cope out. I’ve already put so much out there in an attempt to keep the conversation going about things I care about: endometriosis, mental illness, and child abuse, among many other things. To back out now, to censor myself and my life, feels a bit like cowardice. Ugh. I just don’t know. Maybe I’m thinking too much about this and no one will like my post and no one will click back to this blog so it won’t matter!

Speaking of blogs that rock, that’s all of you guys. Fellow bloggers who mom, you ever thought about writing something for Scary Mommy? Well you should. So many of you are bursting at the seams with talent. If you want to give it a shot, here’s the info about how to write for Scarymommy.com.

In the meantime, would you be scared too if you were me?

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21 comments

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  1. Taara Donley

    Wow! Congratulations, Steph!!! I’m so excited for you! (I’ve tried submitting something to Scary Mommy about 6-7 times and was rejected each time. You can see them in my “rejection diaries folder). I’m on Scary Mommy posting comments just about every day…. So I will definitely read and post a positive comment for you when your article goes live! Congratulations!!!

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  2. Taara Donley

    Shoot, I hit submit too soon…. As for being scared, yeah, I’d be scared too. I think it’s only natural for a writer to feel trepidation after pouring her heart out onto a page and then send it out into the world for judgement. I’m sure you’ll receive positive responses from people, so have no fear! Go for it! 🙂

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    • Steph Mignon

      Taara, thank you soooo much for the well wishes and support. It means a lot. I think I’m just going to go for it, leave all that I’ve done here out for the world to see. Who knows, maybe my story WILL help someone! People will hate, but hopefully people will show some love too. PS – I can’t wait to read your rejection diaries, I bet they’re awesome.

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  3. cassiedash

    I would be sooooo scared too! So freaking scared. Makes total sense. But I know you’re brave and you’re strong and, whether you choose to “hide” some of your content here or not, opening yourself up in this way is an amazing way to reach others who have or will be going through what you have already survived (whether it be childhood abuse, new motherhood, or anything else). So proud of you, friend!

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    • Steph Mignon

      Soooooo true! The whole point is to help others, while helping myself. So I think I’ll do a little rearranging, but won’t hide exactly. Hiding all I care about certainly won’t make me feel “better” about where I’ve been or where I’m going. Thanks for your input dear friend!

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  4. Vickie Ceccato

    absolutely. I also would like to write for scary mommy, but am afraid of what might happen. The imaginary fear ends up being a hundred times worse than the rational fear, though right? Good luck:)

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  5. playinghousewi

    Sometimes sharing the things that are scariest make the biggest difference to others, and in turn, to ourselves. It gives new meaning to life’s hardships/challenges/personal stuff. You’re a brave momma. I hope you get a great response!

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  6. bloggerkuwait

    I love that you’re pregnant! Congratulations dear friend. And congratulations about being published. I know this is a private and more sensitive area of your life, but you’re teaching us so much, and you never know whose lives you may touch as well. We’re so worried about opening up, but once we do we may connect on so many levels to others we hadn’t connected to before. Congratulations again 🙂

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      • bloggerkuwait

        Everything is going good! Moved back to the US about a year ago, and happy to be back. Not ready for next baby yet, but I am so happy that you are! How was getting pregnant like for you again?

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      • Steph Mignon

        I was doing this 90-Day challenge where I made it a point to get all the nutrients I need from food and food alone, so I was being and feeling super healthy, except for all the champagne haha! And even though we weren’t NOT trying, we weren’t trying, and I didn’t think it would happen because I was still bf and my periods weren’t regular, but it did! I found out I was pregnant the day my dog died – such a weird day! Bittersweet miracles, ya know?

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      • bloggerkuwait

        For sure! But isn’t that how it usually works! Haha! They always say…when a soul leaves another one enters. That’s fantastic that you were on a health journey. I changed my diet and lifestyle and saw how much of an impact food and toxins has on us infertiles! Keep up the health journey if you can, your body and your babies will thank you later 🙂

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  7. Daryl

    You should be so proud of the piece that’s going to appear on Scary Mommy, as well as all those pieces you’re tempted to hide. You write about topics no one wants to talk about, which is hard and scary, but so worth it if it starts a conversation or makes someone stop and think before they make an insensitive comment about someone else’s life/choices. Go you! And congrats again! I hope you get lots of positive feedback!

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  8. DAY #17: A Modified “NaNoWriMo” Challenge (Write 15 Minutes of Garbage Every Day) | A Writing Mama's Journal

    […] Steph Mignon:  She’s a fellow stay at home mom who loves writing.  The two of us have enjoyed a good dialogue about the challenges of juggling parenting and writing.  I admire the truth and honesty with which she tells her story.  Her article, called “Weaning Woes” will appear on Scary Mommy on October 20, 2015.  Please stop by and check it out. […]

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